n this article I will share with you a technique for selecting auspicious wedding dates – Chinese style. There are many ways to skin a cat. Like that, there are also many ways to calculate auspicious Chinese wedding dates. And even within a certain way or method, the steps or scope can differ. For example some practitioners only take the birth data of the groom and bride. Others factor the birth data of the in-laws into the computation.
To understand Chinese wedding date selection better, you need to know the basis of Chinese time-keeping using the Heavenly Stems and Earthly Branches. So please jump over there for a good read before you proceed.
I must caution that whatever I share with you below is not THE ONE AND ONLY method for selecting auspicious wedding dates. So you should not be surprise if you come across another way.
Let’s start. Do you know the Chinese Zodiac animal sign of your year of birth? If you do not know, you can easily find out using the tools that are available on the net. There is a clash relation between the animals of the Chinese zodiac. For example the Rat clash with the Horse, while the Rabbit clash with the Rooster etc. You can read about it my article on Chinese Astrology Compatibility.
Now let’s say you are a Rat. Since the Rat has a clash relationship with the Horse, then you should not get married in the year of the Horse. That is it. Let’s take another example. If you are a Rabbit, then you should not get married in the year of the Rooster as the Rabbit clash with the Rooster.
Some practitioners eliminate the clash months as well. For example if you are a Rat, you should not marry in a Horse year as well as a Horse month (typically around June). Similarly if you are a Rabbit, you should not get married in a Rooster year and Rooster month (typically around November).
Next you would want to narrow down the range. Let’s say the first quarter of the following year. The first step is to eliminate all inauspicious dates within this period. Highly Inauspicious dates include Year Breaker days (where the branch of the year clash with branch of the day), Month Breaker days (where the branch of the month clash with the branch of the day) and the Personal Clash Day (where the branch of your year of birth clash with the day). For example if you are born in the year of the Rat, then you should not get married on any Horse day.
There are other inauspicious days such as the Four Extinct and Four Departure Days, the Impoverish or No Wealth Days etc. This is where things differ again. Some practitioners eliminate all of these days. Some others eliminate some of them. It all depends on their lineage.
Now you have a set of calendar days from Jan 1st to Mar 31st with the inauspicious and personal clash days crossed out. The remaining days are either auspicious or at worse neutral. So how do you select a good date from the bunch?
For me, I will filter them using the Establish Divest 12 Gods method (also known as the 12 Day Officers with Shen Sha method). In this method every 12 days or so forms a cycle. Each day of the cycle is given a name, has a characteristic and is suitable for certain purpose. For example the first day of the cycle is “Establish” and it is suitable for activities that involve a beginning such as engagement, starting a job, beginning construction or seeking knowledge. Others like “Divest” is suitable for cleaning, demolition and repairs which others like “Succeed” days are suitable for most endeavours.
| 12 Day Officer | Suitable for Marriage |
|---|---|
| Establish | Depends |
| Divest | No |
| Full | Yes |
| Balance | Yes |
| Set | No |
| Hold | Yes |
| Break | No |
| Danger | No |
| Succeed | Yes |
| Receive | Depends |
| Open | Yes |
| Close | No |
Please refer to the table for the names of the day officer. I have also indicated which days are suitable for marriage.
You can find out the Officer of the day by referring to the Chinese Almanac of the year or some reference text. Cross out those days that are not suitable for marriage. By now you should have a much reduce calendar set of days. In practice you may want to wed say only on a Friday, Saturday or Sunday. If so, you cross the others days and end up with an even further reduced set of days.
Are the remaining days suitable for marriage? The answer is technically yes but. But what? Professional practitioners will go one step further to figure out the stars (or energy) that influences the day. Some days are influence by positive energies, some of which are highly auspicious for marriage. Some days are not. So you see, the days are not equal and some are better than the rest.
I will not be able share with you how to figure out the energies that influence each day. It will take another article (more likely a chapter). Maybe I will do it someday. Meanwhile I hope the above is enough for you to get you going.
